Thursday, September 30, 2010

Mental Breakdown

Mental breakdown. My life has come to a point where I just don't know what to do anymore. Recently my whole perspective on life has changed, and while I still hold my values, a lot of things have changed. I thought that I had everything figured out; I was set and ready to go. I was clearly wrong. Friendships have been questioned, my intended major and college choice are completely down the tubes, my family situation is in shambles; it's getting harder and harder to focus on what's important.
While I had planned to attend Northwestern College, I've decided that's not what I want anymore. Well at least I'm not sure if that's what I want. I want the college experience and that's not going to happen at Northwestern. My major, while I still have an interest in English, just doesn't seem plausible anymore. I want to join the Peace Corps but what do I do after that? It seems like I'm always second guessing or questioning myself and I can never get the answer right. Is there an answer?
It feels like there is just so much going on, like I'm running a mile a minute, and I just can't slow down. Unfortunately, I'm running into a brick wall. There's no escape from the monotonous life that I'm in and any answers that I might find are just beyond my reach, yet I can't find them.
In short, THIS SUCKS!